Julie
Hi there- I can empathize with your situation. I have a 4 1/2 year old daughter who did the same thing with her bowel movements. What we have done is remove all cheese and milk produts from her diet. We give her Sunny Delite to drink for her calcium, she loves to eat broccoli (another great source of calcium and fiber.) Since doing this, she FINALLY will do a movement almost every day, without holding it in. It hurts them to go when they hold it in for so long, so it stopped her from being fully toilet trained; she had been potty trained for 2 years, but did not and would not do a bowel movement in the toilet, let alone a pull up at times. We have a lot of fresh fruit on hand, and we give her plenty to drink. You may try giving her high fiber cereal, like Mini Wheats or Raisin Bran with a little skim milk. We do this for our daughter so she can have a little milk. Try making bran muffins (tell her it is a cupcake, it works!) Veggies and dip works wonders as well, they love the taste of Ranch dip. Hope this helps. Good luck.